Friday, August 04, 2006

Ron lost his battle early this morning. We did get him into the hospital after all, in the palliative care ward. Along with the cancer that had spread throughout his body and the blood clots, he had also developed pneumonia. I’m not sure which one it was that took him - it was just all too much. He was a fighter right up until the end though. He died very peacefully in his sleep. We had had many long talks and I think we had reached a peace with what was coming.

But I want to share some of what made Ron so special. I want this to be a celebration. The name of my blog is Ramblings on Romance so I want to tell my romance. To tell a story of two ordinary people who met, fell in love, married and loved each other for over 30 years – warts and all.

I think when we first meet the guy who we think might be “it” we give him little tests. Ron passed them all with flying colours. First of all and most important – I thought he was hot. Now remember, these were the days when long hair on guys was popular and having been raised by a father who was a CO for Air Cadets where long hair on guys was an anathema. “There was no way any daughter of his was going out with some long haired hippy freak!” I can still hear him saying. Well, of course that made it all the more attractive to me! And Ron had long hair – almost as long as mine. First test – aced. I said he was an open reader. The book I had just finished reading the night I met him was Alice in Wonderland. Now it’s a completely different book when read as an adult than as a child. I was telling Ron this and he seemed very interested in reading it. I could tell he was sincere. I mean a guy – who was willing to read Alice in Wonderland to impress a girl? Second test – aced. And later he did indeed read it – and liked it quite a bit. Now the third test was not very smart of me in hindsight. I lived on my own with Lisa my middle sister who was finishing up the school year. My parents had just moved back to the city I grew up in and I stayed as I had a job and it was time to spread my wings. I invited this guy I had just met in a bar back to my place. Very dumb. We stayed up until 4:30 in the morning talking – books, music; my favourite group at the time was Styx, and he hadn’t really listened to them. But he listened to my albums and liked them. Then when left, he didn’t make a move – well he didn’t kiss me. Instead he gave me the biggest, warmest hug. Then he walked about 8 miles home. (Not only did I invite him back to my place – dumb – I drove and he left his buddies who’d given him a ride behind to come with me. Ace, ace, ace! He called the next day and we talked for hours on the phone. He asked me out for a date. I don’t remember exactly how long after that we had our first date – it’s been over 30 years now but it was the oddest date I’d ever been on, not that I had that many to compare it too, I was only 20 and very shy with guys. He somehow talked me into donating blood with him and then going out to dinner after. I had never done it before but he was a regular donor. I think things work differently here in Canada. All blood is donated, not sold. I didn’t really want to do it - ick, but I figured if the guy liked my music and was willing to read Alice in Wonderland, I could do something he wanted me to do. I was trying to impress him too after all. And he was hot!! He really scored major points for being civic minded. At the end of the evening he kissed me, but just a little one. Left me wanting more. Our third date was a test for both of us. He asked me to go swimming. Now this was a major hurdle for me. I’ve always battled weight problems and while when I met him, I had lost some weight, I was still in double digits size wise and very self-conscious. Very! Self!-Conscious! When I stripped down to my one piece bathing suit, I was waiting for him to call a quick end to the date. But he didn’t. Low and behold he thought I was hot. And he was hot. We were hot together. We were in the water swimming and playing around when he came up behind me, grabbed me and really kissed me this time. Lord have mercy I thought lightning had struck that water!!!! I felt tingles ‘all over my body’. He felt them too, I could tell (heh heh) And mama not only did he ace that test, little did he know it, but that day he was a goner. Ropped, tied and hornswaggled in all but deed. THIS was the man I was going to marry!!!! Poor guy – he never had a chance. We met in June, I proposed in July – yep, you read that right, I asked him to marry me – and he accepted – and we got married in August.

To be continued

‘til later


PS - thank you all for your comments in the previous posts! I've read them and they have meant a great deal to me in a time of sorrow.

43 comments:

Anonymous said...

Kristie - what a beautiful story. I look forward to reading the rest. I'm so sorry for your loss, but am glad that Ron is out of pain. Thoughts and prayers are with you.

Bob & Muffintop said...

May he rest in peace, Kristie. Hugs & prayers to you & your family. I'm looking forward to hearing the rest of your story.

Mad said...

I'm so sorry for your loss..hugs!

erika said...

Aw Jeeze, Kristi! What a wonderful romance you all had. And so sad this happened!((((HUGS))))

Lori said...

Kristie, I'm so sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your kids.

It sounds like you had such a wonderful life together. I hope those warm wonderful memnories will sustain you through these difficult times.

Kailana said...

I am very sorry for your loss! A wonderful story, though. I look forward to reading more of it.

Marg said...

Big hugs to you and your family from half a world away Kristie.

Your story bought tears to my eyes. What fantastic memories to have and treasure.

I'm sorry for your loss, and my thoughts are with you all.

romancelover said...

Kristie,
Your family is in my thoughts and prayers. We're all with you. I'm so sorry for your loss. You and Ron had amazing times and he was very lucky to have you in his life (as you were lucky to have him). I'm here for you.
- Daniela

Nikki said...

I'm so sorry for you loss, Kristie....Your story is the best romance I have read this year, because it is real. Your love is real. Having over 30 years with the love of your life, that is really what life is all about.

sybil said...

What a wonderful way to remember Ron.

Thank you for sharing. You know we are here for you. I wish there was something more we could do.

Rosie said...

My condolences on your loss. How blessed you were to have him for 30 years. I too look forward to reading more of your story.

Tara Marie said...

I'm so sorry, and my thoughts and prayers are with you and your boys.

Your love story is wonderful and beautiful tribute to 30 years together.

Hugs, love and prayers, Tara

Anonymous said...

Kristie,

What a lovely story and beautiful memories to have. I'm so sorry for your loss.

~jmc

Anonymous said...

What an awesome story. Thanks for sharing. Your loss is enormous and to remember the good times takes a lot of courage and strength.

Anonymous said...

Thank you for sharing your story of how you met Ron. What a sweetheart. I am so sorry for your loss.

Megan Frampton said...

That is a lovely memory, Kristie. Ron sounds like a great guy.
Alice in Wonderland is a HUGE test. What a trooper!

Anne said...

What a fabulous tribute to your's and Ron's love and all that you shared. How wonderful! You're right, celebrating love is the perfect thing to do. What a wonderful story.

Kristie, I am so sorry for your loss, and I'm also glad that Ron no longer has any pain. You have my deepest sympathy and you and your family are in my prayers. (((HUGS)))

Anonymous said...

(((((Kristie))))) If this entry isn't a fitting tribute, I don't know what is. In a lot of ways, your romance sounds a lot like my parents.

I will keep you and yours in my thoughts and prayers. God bless you & keep you in his arms. :)

Sam said...

((((((((((HUGS))))))))))
I'm so sorry for your loss -
My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Nicole said...

Oh, what a wonderful story.

*hugs* You're definitely in my thoughts.

Wendy said...

He read Alice In Wonderland? That's it, The Boyfriend sleeps on the couch tonight.

Doll, I'm so sorry you're going through this. My heart is breaking for you....

Stacy~ said...

Kristie, thank you for sharing your story with us - it's beautiful. You were truly meant to be together and I know you will be again. You're both brave, courageous souls, and I am so very sorry for your loss

Dev said...

Kristie ~ Thank you for sharing your and Ron's story. It's truly beautiful and I'm so glad that you have memories like that. Spending 30 years with a man like that is truly a blessing.

You're in my prayers.

Mechele Armstrong said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. I read the other post last night but somehow missed this one. My thoughts are with you. Thank you for sharing this great story. I loved it. ((Hugs))

meljean brook said...

I'm so sorry for your loss -- and what an incredible story to share. This is what it's all about, isn't it? Can't wait to hear the rest.

Anonymous said...

Kristie: I'm incredibly sorry for your loss.
Thank you for taking the time to post your wonderful tribute to Ron.

Anonymous said...

I'm so sorry Kristie, words just can't express how much, but how lucky you were to have found your love and have 30 years together. What a wonderful man.


Major hugs and my prayers and my sympathies to you and your family.

Suisan said...

Hang in there, love. And thanks for putting into words how special Ron was.

(And I have to agree with Wendy there. My husband never read Alice in Wonderland, she said, kicking her toe in the dirt.)

Anonymous said...

Kristie, my heart is with you. I am so sorry for your loss.

Devon said...

I'm so sorry for your loss, Kristie. I look forward to reading more of your story. What a lovely tribute to Ron and your life together. I'll be thinking of you.

Icelandelf said...

Kristie, you and your family are in my prayers. Your story was beautiful and I look forward to reading the rest of the story. I'm so very sorry for your loss.

Debbi S.

nath said...

Mes condoléances Kristie. Be brave and look forward.

CindyS said...

I knew you had married young but Oh, my!! Love at first 3 tests indeed ;) Bob and I would have married just as quick except he was still married. It's all good. He's ex is now my best friend.

I look forward to celebrating Ron's life through your posts.

I can't help but think of the song lyrics 'and then he kissed me'. Isn't it funny how us shy types will suddenly grab what we want. I love that you proposed.

Can't wait to hear more.

Thinking of you and your family
CindyS

Anonymous said...

I’m very sorry for your loss. You’re in my thoughts. What a lovely story.

Anna Carrasco Bowling said...

Kristie, I'm sorry for your loss. Ron really does sound like the love of a lifetime. Hugs and prayers.

Jaci Burton said...

I'm so sorry for your loss, Kristi. I just lost my father in law this past week, too.

But what a wonderful celebration of his life and the love you two shared you have posted. He sounds like a very special, very loving man. You (and he) were very lucky to have found each other and shared some incredible years together. I hope you hold onto those sweet memories to sustain you during this time.

Hugs

Jaci

ReneeW said...

Kristie, I'm so very sorry for your loss but thank you so much for sharing such beautiful memories and making me smile. What a very special person he was. My prayers are with you and your family and I look forward to the rest of the story.

~ames~ said...

I am so very sorry for your loss. That's such a great story and I'm glad you shared it.

C2 said...

((((Kristie)))) I'm so sorry for your loss.

Grace said...

Kristie,
I'm so sorry for your loss. Your story was very touching and so beautiful. Thank you for sharing with us.

You and your family will be in my prayers.

Hugs

Rowena said...

(((((((Kristie)))))))))

My heart goes out to you sweetie, I'm sorry for your loss but I think that was a wonderful tribute to Ron.

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family at this time.

Hugs,
Dylan

Rosario said...

[[[Kristie]]] What a beautiful, romantic story!

Valeen said...

I'm so sorry for your family's loss. ((HUGS)) to you and yours.