Ron lost his battle early this morning. We did get him into the hospital after all, in the palliative care ward. Along with the cancer that had spread throughout his body and the blood clots, he had also developed pneumonia. I’m not sure which one it was that took him - it was just all too much. He was a fighter right up until the end though. He died very peacefully in his sleep. We had had many long talks and I think we had reached a peace with what was coming.

But I want to share some of what made Ron so special. I want this to be a celebration. The name of my blog is Ramblings on Romance so I want to tell my romance. To tell a story of two ordinary people who met, fell in love, married and loved each other for over 30 years – warts and all.

I think when we first meet the guy who we think might be “it” we give him little tests. Ron passed them all with flying colours. First of all and most important – I thought he was hot. Now remember, these were the days when long hair on guys was popular and having been raised by a father who was a CO for Air Cadets where long hair on guys was an anathema. “There was no way any daughter of his was going out with some long haired hippy freak!” I can still hear him saying. Well, of course that made it all the more attractive to me! And Ron had long hair – almost as long as mine. First test – aced. I said he was an open reader. The book I had just finished reading the night I met him was Alice in Wonderland. Now it’s a completely different book when read as an adult than as a child. I was telling Ron this and he seemed very interested in reading it. I could tell he was sincere. I mean a guy – who was willing to read Alice in Wonderland to impress a girl? Second test – aced. And later he did indeed read it – and liked it quite a bit. Now the third test was not very smart of me in hindsight. I lived on my own with Lisa my middle sister who was finishing up the school year. My parents had just moved back to the city I grew up in and I stayed as I had a job and it was time to spread my wings. I invited this guy I had just met in a bar back to my place. Very dumb. We stayed up until 4:30 in the morning talking – books, music; my favourite group at the time was Styx, and he hadn’t really listened to them. But he listened to my albums and liked them. Then when left, he didn’t make a move – well he didn’t kiss me. Instead he gave me the biggest, warmest hug. Then he walked about 8 miles home. (Not only did I invite him back to my place – dumb – I drove and he left his buddies who’d given him a ride behind to come with me. Ace, ace, ace! He called the next day and we talked for hours on the phone. He asked me out for a date. I don’t remember exactly how long after that we had our first date – it’s been over 30 years now but it was the oddest date I’d ever been on, not that I had that many to compare it too, I was only 20 and very shy with guys. He somehow talked me into donating blood with him and then going out to dinner after. I had never done it before but he was a regular donor. I think things work differently here in Canada. All blood is donated, not sold. I didn’t really want to do it - ick, but I figured if the guy liked my music and was willing to read Alice in Wonderland, I could do something he wanted me to do. I was trying to impress him too after all. And he was hot!! He really scored major points for being civic minded. At the end of the evening he kissed me, but just a little one. Left me wanting more. Our third date was a test for both of us. He asked me to go swimming. Now this was a major hurdle for me. I’ve always battled weight problems and while when I met him, I had lost some weight, I was still in double digits size wise and very self-conscious. Very! Self!-Conscious! When I stripped down to my one piece bathing suit, I was waiting for him to call a quick end to the date. But he didn’t. Low and behold he thought I was hot. And he was hot. We were hot together. We were in the water swimming and playing around when he came up behind me, grabbed me and really kissed me this time. Lord have mercy I thought lightning had struck that water!!!! I felt tingles ‘all over my body’. He felt them too, I could tell (heh heh) And mama not only did he ace that test, little did he know it, but that day he was a goner. Ropped, tied and hornswaggled in all but deed. THIS was the man I was going to marry!!!! Poor guy – he never had a chance. We met in June, I proposed in July – yep, you read that right, I asked him to marry me – and he accepted – and we got married in August.

To be continued

‘til later

PS - thank you all for your comments in the previous posts! I've read them and they have meant a great deal to me in a time of sorrow.