Sunday, May 20, 2007

Adventures in Dog Sitting - Part Two

Even MORE reasons why I will never be a dog owner

# 155
Arthur the Dog's overwhelming need to be the first one out of the door. I have my shoes at the back door and he just HAS to move ahead of me and then sit on them waiting for me to take him outside. Stupid dog - this is my house, not yours.

Prissy dog owning neighbours who pick up their stupid little dogs and shie away from my Arthur the Dog when we pass them on the sidewalk. While a terror when confronted by dogs the same size or larger than Arthur - he just loves little dogs and is all 'Big Brother' dog on them. I was personally affronted when the prissy neighbour picked up his Shitz Zoo (I know it's spelled wrong) and sniffed the air and sidled by Arthur the Dog. Nobody puts Arthur in the corner - oops wrong movie.

Having to close bathroom door when showering. Living here alone, I never bother to close the bathroom door anymore. When I threw back the shower curtain this morning I had a cold wet dog snout aimed right at my naked crotch area. I shrieked, Arthur the Dog barked and this time I didn't gently say "Get the fuck out of her!" No - I screamed it at the top of my lungs


I did have the previous #1 reason why I will never be a dog owner listed as dog shit. That has now been dropped down to #2. Reason number 1 - Doggie Diarreah. Yes - when Arthur the Dog and I went for "that" walk last night, Arthur had doggie diarreah. Big time. I thought regular dog shit was horrid stuff. Well - now I know what's worse. After the FOURTH time he dribbled, the contents of my stomach just about emptied out. And even worse, Arthur the Dog has this beautiful long fur down his back legs.

Let us just say there is a towel that will never be used for anything again. And Arthur the Dog wasn't allowed on my light beige carpets for QUITE SOME TIME.

And I needed some pictures of my Zena - even though she hasn't been seen or heard from since Arthur the Dog made his appearance.

Til later


Lori said...

LOL - poor Arthur the Dog. Little rat doggies being picked up and moved around him, and then suffering the indignity of having his ass wiped by a hunman.

I relate to the doggy diarrhea on the long skirt - my dog has one, too. It sucks cleaning that. And I do sympathize with the shower story, too. Although I do love your Arthur the Dog stories!

Rosie said...

Ah geez, poor Kristie! How much longer? Although I had to laughat your shower greeting.

Kristie (J) said...

Rosie: She's coming back late tonight - but since she lives out of town she's not picking him up until tomorrow - EARLY tomorrow (I hope)!

Lori: It sure gave me a jolt when I opened that shower curtain I tell you. I could almost hear thim thinkging "Gotcha heh heh!"

ReneeW said...

I'm laughing at your stories and totally sympathize. Why do they always go for the crotch? Jeez. I do love dogs, but it's better if they belong to someone else. I see kitty is busy picking out a book for you to read. What a smart kitty. Did you train her for that or is she just naturally smart? :)

nath said...

LOL :D I love your reasons Kristie :D you don't think of dog diarrhea when you get one LOL :D you'll have to compile them one day!

Anonymous said...

You need to write a story about Arthur...........see how protective you were of him when the neighbour picked up his little dog? *grin

I think you would make a great dog owner........hehe.

Zeek said...

Still that's a real pretty dog! (the cat's gorgeous as well!)

Kristie (J) said...

Zeke: He is a gorgeous dog - I'll give him that. And a mostly well- behaved dog - once he stops his whinning and barking. And he is good with little dogs and children. He does have a lot of good qualities but.......

Janice: LOL - I may have good dog owner tendancies in me and at times I almost consider it - but they will never come to fruition. I went through my child rearing days and that's what dogs are like - kids that never grow up :) I've gotten too selfish in my old age to want to start over again - with one that will never grow up.

Renee: I don't know what it is about that area of the body and it's something I don't want to analyze *g*. And that's my attitude too. They are fine as long as I'm not their owner! And Zina is very intelligent. She loves it when I read - so she can come up and walk all over the book until I'm forced to put it down and pet her for a bit. And also cats love to walk on newspapers when you are trying to read them too.