Sunday, May 20, 2007
Adventures in Dog Sitting - Part Two
Even MORE reasons why I will never be a dog owner
Arthur the Dog's overwhelming need to be the first one out of the door. I have my shoes at the back door and he just HAS to move ahead of me and then sit on them waiting for me to take him outside. Stupid dog - this is my house, not yours.
Prissy dog owning neighbours who pick up their stupid little dogs and shie away from my Arthur the Dog when we pass them on the sidewalk. While a terror when confronted by dogs the same size or larger than Arthur - he just loves little dogs and is all 'Big Brother' dog on them. I was personally affronted when the prissy neighbour picked up his Shitz Zoo (I know it's spelled wrong) and sniffed the air and sidled by Arthur the Dog. Nobody puts Arthur in the corner - oops wrong movie.
Having to close bathroom door when showering. Living here alone, I never bother to close the bathroom door anymore. When I threw back the shower curtain this morning I had a cold wet dog snout aimed right at my naked crotch area. I shrieked, Arthur the Dog barked and this time I didn't gently say "Get the fuck out of her!" No - I screamed it at the top of my lungs
CAUTION - THE FOLLOWING MY CONTAIN MATERIAL NOT SUITABLE FOR ALL READERS
I did have the previous #1 reason why I will never be a dog owner listed as dog shit. That has now been dropped down to #2. Reason number 1 - Doggie Diarreah. Yes - when Arthur the Dog and I went for "that" walk last night, Arthur had doggie diarreah. Big time. I thought regular dog shit was horrid stuff. Well - now I know what's worse. After the FOURTH time he dribbled, the contents of my stomach just about emptied out. And even worse, Arthur the Dog has this beautiful long fur down his back legs.
Let us just say there is a towel that will never be used for anything again. And Arthur the Dog wasn't allowed on my light beige carpets for QUITE SOME TIME.
And I needed some pictures of my Zena - even though she hasn't been seen or heard from since Arthur the Dog made his appearance.