I decided yesterday to stop working. I haven't told Ron yet because I know he's going to try and talk me out of it - all along he has wanted me to keep working but it's been harder and harder to leave him in the morning. But that little voice inside me said "it's time". One thing that made it harder to reach this decision is that I'm only on contract where I work and I really like working there and I really like the job I'm doing; it's been my hope that they would hire me on full time at the end of my contract, but that has become less and less important. I talked to my supervisor there yesterday and told her that I'm thinking of leaving. She was very understanding and told me to take the rest of the day off - with pay. Later on I got a call from the agency and they said that the company I'm working for wants me back after - good little worker bee that I am. That really was a load off my mind. I don't have to worry about money - I am eligible for 'compasionate care' as the primary caregiver - all these new terms I'm learning. The agency will put a rush on my record of employment so I can start collecting sooner.
I'm still not sure how to tell Ron. I was with some friends last night and they all offered good advice. Another thing I can tell Ron as to why I've decided to stay home is to get my own health back again. I have high blood pressure (one of the wonderful things that comes with getting older). It's gone through the roof in the last little while - no real suprise there!
But I just want to spend as much time with Ron as I can now.
Of course the reader/blogger in me knows I'll have more time for that now since he sleeps a good part of the day.
I haven't had time off in over a year - you don't get paid if you are on contact and take time off - so just that alone will be nice. I've been in touch with Hospice London and they have all kinds of services for caretakes that are available from seminars to massage therapy. In fact I'm off shortly to meet with someone they "matched" me with whom I can talk too.
So - that's where I am now. I feel at piece about the decision; I know it's the right one. I just hope Ron accepts it when I tell him.