The Wacky Reasons I Do The Things I Do

I’m still bored at work. They have decided to hire a couple of Case Managers to cover for the two of mine that are off so hopefully things will pick up then. But until such time, I have lots of time to think and lots of time to kill.

I was thinking of a few wacky reasons why I do things. For example, I made an appointment to stop and donate blood on the way home from work tonight. It’s not because I’m being particularly altruistic, though that is part of it. There is a real need and since needles don’t bother me and I’m quite healthy there’s no reason not to, but the real reason is Canadian Blood Services has my number. And they call me. All the time. The last time I donated was back in December and it’s a three month wait before you can donate again. I don’t like talking to them on the phone – I don’t like talking to most people on the phone – email or in person is my preferred method of communication – so by calling them and donating again, I’m safe from their calls for another 3 months.

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We have an IM message system here at work. It’s great since sometimes there are times I need to get in touch with fellow coworkers in the hospitals with questions and I don’t really like talking to them on the phone. I figure if I’m asking them for a favour, which is usually the case, I could at least give them a laugh since I’m asking for something. A few weeks ago this happened and I don’t really remember how we got on the subject, but I ended up IMing her how I heard that putting toothpaste on zits brought them to a head so I’ve tried it a few times. I guess thinking of me sitting at home with toothpaste on my face must have tickled her funny bone ‘cause she wrote back that I was making her cry, she was laughing so hard.

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There’s another contact I have at another hospital. Whenever I have to ask her something, I start by asking if she watched Hawaii Five 0. We both lust over Alec O’Laughin so while we are both weak-kneed over him taking off his shirt and diving into the water; I can slip in and ask a favour. We both agree it was a good show if he happened to take his shirt off to dive into the waters of Hawaii!!

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My fear of falling isn’t getting better; oddly enough it’s getting worse. I’ve fallen twice this slippery winter already – not to worry, I wasn’t hurt either time but I was shook up darn good! I’m not perfect. I know, I know, you all think I am, but I’m not. One of my biggest faults is I’m very lazy. I don’t like shoveling the snow – only part of the reason being said fear of falling. I’ve already gotten two notices from the post office to keep my front sidewalk cleared. I use the back door all the time so shoveling the front just isn’t on my radar until I get a notice from the post office. With this in mind, it snowed last Saturday evening. Now a person less lazy would have shoveled their front sidewalk on Sunday if they had already gotten two notices from the post office. But, I’m lazy so I didn’t get around to it. Instead I waited until later, when it was dark, to go out and shovel. By that time of course the temperature had dropped and it was REAL slippery. And it was dark. And I couldn’t see and I was terrified of falling. So instead of shoveling, I went back in the house. The next morning I was stumped – what should I do? If I didn’t shovel the sidewalk, someone from the post office might actually come to the door. Or even worse they might call me on the phone. So I called into work and said I’d be about an hour late. I didn’t tell them the reason was because I was so gosh darn lazy that I didn’t shovel my sidewalk when I could have. I shoveled in the morning and did a great job, then went into work late.

When I got home from work, the snow plow had gone by and plowed in the end of the sidewalk. I haven’t got mail all week. But then that’s fine because along with not wanting to talk on the phone, I don’t open mail.

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I went to a Trivia Pursuit Night – a fund raiser event a week or so ago. The money raised would be going to the hospice centre in the city I live in. It seemed very fitting that the Supportive Care department enter a team, I used their services myself and I have a head stuffed with nonsensical trivia that crowds out important stuff. So it was a given that I would go. The person who arranged it mentioned a basket of wine as a grand prize but I didn’t pay much attention; rather trying for a change, to keep all kinds of trivial minutia from leaking out. The night of the event arrived and out of the eight man team, three were no shows, two of them being my case managers who are on extended leave, thus resulting in the boredom I find myself in at work these days. While the rest of us were sitting there, people came around selling tickets for $10 for this game they would be playing during half time called Heads or Tails. The tickets seemed quite costly to me, but everyone else at the table bought one so I felt obligated. Plus it was a fund raiser for a good cause. Half time came; we were middle of the pack point wise and happy with that since we only had a part team and it was time for the game. The object of the game was to be the last one standing. All those who had paid to play stood up and put their hands on either their heads or their ‘tails’ another name for rump, booty, ass, whatever. The dude at the front flipped a coin and whichever side came up, whatever you were holding – you either stayed standing or sat down; out of the game. Well, wonder of wonders, I kept guessing and holding the right body part until it down to just two of us. At that point we had to stand up at the front back to back so I couldn’t tell where her hands were and vice versa. The coin was flipped. The tension was thick. “Moose head!” the announcer called out. There was applause. I had my hands on my butt so I turned around and congratulated her figuring she must have had her hands on her head, and headed back to my table. Much to my surprise, they came running after me. Seems the announcer was trying to be funny and if you are familiar with Canadian quarters, the moose head is the tail – I know – doesn’t really make sense does it. But it seems I won the big prize of the night!! The prize – a huge basket full of wine (if you remember from an earlier post). And I don’t drink wine!! There are 12 bottles of the stuff – well, 10 now since I gave a bottle of red and a bottle of white to the ‘Son who is getting married’ and his fiancé ‘who we are calling Kara’. The son who I shall call Ryan since it’s quicker than calling him The Son who is getting married or The Son who is an accountant doesn’t like wine much but Kara is quite the fan. I haven’t been able to drink it for a while now. There was also a wine stopper to keep the wine that I can't drink anymore fresh. And there are a couple of wine glasses they are OK. Then there's a thingy that you put cheese in and then in the oven to make it all soft and then add walnuts and dip crackers into it. Or so The soon to be daughter-in-law we are calling Kara said. I say it may make a great re-gift.

And just so everyone doesn’t get too confused, The Son we are calling Ryan is not to be confused with The Son we will call Brentor The Son who is conspiracy nut and/or The Son who Broke my House (including my leg)

This may or may not be The son we are calling Ryan and my soon to be daughter-in-law we are calling Kara.