I have a confession to make

This is a biggie!

I don`t like book signings. Yes - me, who goes to the big Literacy signing at RWA and the most recent one at RT would be just as happy to skip that part of the conference and or convention. It has nothing to do with not wanting the books, but rather other factors

• The line-ups. It seems they are getting longer and longer and starting earlier and earlier. When I went to the one at RT in Columbus, we must have stood there for half an hour or more. It was horrid. I know a lot of people take the time to chat with other readers around them, and that`s always fun, but I just get tired of the standing. I hate standing in line for movies too.

• Once you get in, it`s so damn crowded. For those who suffer from claustrophobia, it can be almost a nightmare trying to manoeuvre around. I can only last a certain amount of time, then I can`t get out quick enough.

• Carrying all the books around. They get heavy after a while!

• Feeling bad for authors who don`t have a line up. You see this all the time and I always feel bad for the authors sitting next to more popular authors. I`d strike up a conversation, but then I`d feel obliged to get their books and see reason above for why that can be a problem.

• I`m uncomfortable with the height differential. I know that`s an odd one considering I`m vertically challenged and look up to most people. Maybe that`s why, but I just feel odd talking to someone I`m looking down at.

• I can never think of anything to say!! I hate that. I usually stumble along, mumbling something and then wishing I hadn`t or I said something more. I`m naturally shy and it kicks in big time when standing in front of, yet looking down at an author.

• I`m not an autograph collector. Even if I were to come face to face with Richard Armitage it wouldn`t occur to me to ask for his autograph. I`d have to bite my tongue to keep from asking if he would kiss me the way he did Margaret at the train station in North and South - but I wouldn`t ask for his autograph.

• I loathe having my picture taken - by anyone, at anytime. So the last thing I would want is to have a picture of me standing next to an author.

• I don`t mean this in the least bit offensive way - and this is just me - but I don`t see the point in having a picture of just the author. I`d much rather talk to them - not at an author signing where I can never think of anything to say - but at a food court, or hanging around in a bar, or after a workshop - anywhere other than at an author signing where claustrophobia can hit any time and they are distracted by numerous things. That way I can really talk and the shyness takes a back seat. But if I wanted to see what an author looks like, I could just go to their web site. Many of them have pictures there.

• The line ups to pay for the books. I`m always in full blown `have to get out of here`mode and to have to stand in line yet again, to pay for the books is very draining.

• The confusion of what books I want to get. Last year at the book signing in Washington, I thought I`d be smart and make a list out ahead of time. Then I left it at the second author table I went to and for the life of me couldn`t remember which ones I wanted. The same thing happened again in Columbus. I made a list but forgot it and when I got into the signing and saw the huge number of people, I panicked slightly and forgot many of the books I`d planned on getting!

So now I`m not sure what to do at the next one I go to. I`m so tempted to pass on it, but then that just seems so wrong!